Pocket Knife Salad Recipe

Impress your friends with this quick and easy recipe for a creative, fresh, and safe salad, ideal when desperately craving something besides rice and shoe meat.

Yield:
2 enthusiastically large servings

Wine pairing:
Not applicable (on antibiotics)
Substitute electrolyte beverage

Ingredients:
Green cabbage, tree tomato, carrot, onion, garlic, cucumber, red pepper, avocado, cilantro, lime, black pepper, "Salsa para carnes"

Materials:
2 pocket knives
1 enormous orange plastic bowl
1 plastic ziplock container for serving
1 hotel bed
1 partial bolsa of safe water
2 flimsy plastic spoons

Method:
Purchase enormous orange plastic bowl from tienda for $4000. Buy all ingredients from bins at fruit and vegetable vendor. While out, pass a rare pizza place and eat a pizza. Set orange bowl on hotel bed. Wash cilantro in safe water from reserved bolsa. Peel the first 7 ingredients ungracefully using pocket knives, sitting on bed or over bag on floor while stretching hamstrings. Slice all peeled ingredients into discordant shapes using pocket knives directly into orange bowl. Squeeze many small limes over bowl and mix rigorously with flimsy plastic spoon. Scoop avocado into bowl. Inadvertantly smear a portion of avocado on bed. Add cilantro while moaning quietly. Top with final ingredients and serve in ziplock plastic container and said orange bowl.

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